Gone to be with the Lord

I have sat down several times to write this post, but I am just now able to actually complete it.

On this past Thursday, I woke up and noticed Scottie laying in the shower but didn't think anything about it. He would always go in there to lay down probably because it was cold...don't really know why.

When I turned the water on to take my shower though, he didn't move...even though he was getting wet. This was the first sign that there was something wrong. I picked him up and took him to Rudder's dog bed where he sat throughout my shower. I thought maybe he had eaten something (one of the animals had eaten the leftover pork chop from the dinner we had the night before) and just needed to drink water.

Once Brad got up, I told him there was something wrong with Scottie. He tried to make him walk, but you could tell Scottie just wanted to lay there. We both agreed that we should make an appointment with the vet that afternoon if he wasn't any better by the time we got home from work.

That was the last time I saw Scottie...

Since I had a meeting until 4:30, Brad called to tell me he was going home to check on Scottie before picking up Avery from school. A few minutes later, I got a text that read, "call me". I knew then that something was wrong.

When Brad answered the phone, he informed me that Scottie was with God now and that I should come home. I ran out of school bawling.

Apparently Scottie died soon after we left for work, because he was already stiff. Therefore, Brad said that it was probably better I didn't see him and I agreed. I didn't want my last picture of him to be that.

After Brad buried him in the backyard, he took me to Lowes to buy a plant and some stone so we could make a memorial for Scottie. I wanted something that would continue living in his memory. Brad extended the flower bed right outside our bedroom window so that I could see him every day. It is absolutely beautiful.

Here are a few pictures of my sweet baby boy....the way I remember him...

Brad did go to the vet to ask what could have happened and if there was something we could do. The vet informed us that Scottie must have had either a brain tumor, heart defect, or something like that since there was no weight loss, hair loss, or any other symptoms.

Now that several day have passed, I am SLOWLY realizing that there are things I can be thankful for. I am thankful that Brad came home early that day (the ONLY day he came home before 7:00 last week) so I didn't have to be the one to find him. I am thankful that God took Scottie quickly and he didn't have to suffer. I am also thankful that I have a wonderful husband that took care of everything because I was in NO shape to even think clearly that day.

I am still not okay with everything, and I don't think I ever will be. All I can do is to trust in the Lord and look to him for peace.

Scottie was my baby boy. He will always be loved and missed.